Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Aging is the worst. I miss the good ol’ days when my pain was strictly emotional.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.