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Commentary:
"Well, if I'm seeing a therapist, does that count as a relationship status? 🧐 Or should I swipe right on that hallucination instead? 🤔 Maybe I'll just stick to dating guys who are real but may drive me crazy anyway! 🤪💑"

date, funny question, guy, hallucination, humor, question, relationship, seeing, someone, therapist, therapy

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If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

1 month ago
adventure, asked, curiosity, curiosity-driven, decision, exploration, fantasy, front, humor, ID, me, portal, questions
Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

1 month ago
choice, choices, decision, humor, irony, life, making, option, right, uncertainty, wait
Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

1 month ago
afterlife, being, heaven, humor, lazy, people, picked, picked up
I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

3 months ago
admitting, admitting wrong, always, being, being right, break, humor, i, love, me, right, sarcasm, self-deprecating, wrong
Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

1 month ago
activity, Adderall, beach, before, focus, fun, fun activity, going, good, good time, having, humor, i, lay, party, productivity, relaxation, taking, time
You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

4 months ago
camera, classic, classic movie, director, ever, fact, film, film director, film history, funny observation, history, IMDb, kind, movie, movie fact, movie trivia, observation, old, sucks, sun, time, trivia, watch

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

When someone loses something, I like to ask helpful questions like ‘Where did you last see it?’ and ‘Where did you put it?’ and ‘Where is it?’

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Never underestimate my ability to effortlessly make something more difficult than it needs to be.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

I have friends in high places (birds).

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

Making waves on Messenger:

Patience and forbearance are those qualities you develop when there are too many witnesses.

Making waves on YouTube:

Being in love will have you put your pride aside and go to places you never thought you would, like New Jersey.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Even wild things have slow mornings.

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“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Delightful if true: booby trap.

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Sometimes I have to turn off the news and put on a true crime documentary, so I can relax.

I’m an atheist, so if you send prayers, I’ll send thoughts.

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Do you ever cycle through the same 4 apps on your phone over and over again, and feel like a tiger pacing its cage at the zoo?

Age range on my dating app set to 40+. Y’all fighting over grapes while I’m drinking wine.

We used to pass notes in class like spies. Folded like origami. Deep like Shakespeare.

I’m not saying I’m old, but when I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

I wrote a book. It’s a murder mystery. You’re in it but only for the first couple of chapters.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I was going to cause mischief tonight, but I climbed into my bed instead.

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

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“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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