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Commentary:
"Well, if I'm seeing a therapist, does that count as a relationship status? 🧐 Or should I swipe right on that hallucination instead? 🤔 Maybe I'll just stick to dating guys who are real but may drive me crazy anyway! 🤪💑"

date, funny question, guy, hallucination, humor, question, relationship, seeing, someone, therapist, therapy

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

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2 months ago

alarm, alarm clock, better, clock, day, freedom, leisure, next, next day, no work, nothing, relaxation, rest, sleep, work
You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

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5 months ago

ever, funny observation, game, gaming, guys, hallucination, hours, humor, long play, observation, play, sound, sounds, start, straight, video, video game
Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.

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2 months ago

clothing, exercise, humor, irony, jogging, lazy, pants, people
Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

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2 months ago

cartoon, doo, ghost, ghosts, human, humor, joke, mystery, scooby, Scooby Doo, smell
“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

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2 months ago

alert, anticipation, humor, interaction, me, past, sneak, unexpected
Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

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2 months ago

contradiction, daily, daily struggle, feelings, great, humor, internet, life, line, mistake, mixed, mixed feelings, online, online life, struggle, walking

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Slack this month:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

94 shares on Twitch this month:

Being in college when The Chainsmokers dropped Closer was an experience to say the least.

96 shares on Facebook this month:

I had a marvelous time ruining everything.

60 shares on Threads this month:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you ever need nothing, I’m here for you.

47 shares on Instagram this month:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

32 shares on Telegram this month:

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

60 shares on Telegram this month:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Don’t check on your introverted friends this time of year. They’re probably turning their lights off and pretending they’re not home.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Commenting “AI slop” under pictures of my friends’ kids opening presents.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Referring to my boss’s wife as my boss-in-law.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I hate when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Facebook:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Making waves on YouTube:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

Spotted on YouTube:

I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

Just landed via Discord:

Having a crush on someone as an adult feels like a humiliation ritual.

Live now on Threads:

Normalize bed-rotting in the holidays and not feeling guilty about it for your mental health.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Trending via WeChat:

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨