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Commentary:
"Trying to convince everyone that I've completely transformed my life like a 🌟, but they have no idea if I'm now headed towards the North Pole or just a never-ending loop of Netflix binges 🤷‍♂️ #TransformationConfusion"

around, bragging, change, direction, humor, irony, life, perspective, self-improvement

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

2 months ago

chicken, eating, food, funny thought, humor, i, just, light, middle, myself, question, red, red light, run, self-reflection, thought
I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

1 month ago

humor, i, impatience, patience, time, too
Typing in your email address on the TV is a different type of irritation.

2 months ago

address, different, email, email address, experience, frustration, irritation, technology, technology frustration, TV, type, typing, user, user experience
I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

1 month ago

accident, distraction, humor, i, love, phone, reason, relationship, smile, walk, wall
Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

1 month ago

addiction, detox, digital, digital detox, humor, i, interaction, iPhone, judge, judgment, myself, outdoor, outside, people, person, put, remind, self-reminder, social, social interaction, sometimes, technology, technology addiction
You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

1 month ago

humor, Jersey, joke, know, mispronunciation, nude, play, play on words, pronounce, words

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

By the time my CVS receipt finished printing, I was eligible for another prescription refill.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Hide and seek, except it’s my husband searching for where he last put his pants.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Being liked at work comes with so many perks, you could be late as hell, and everyone is just happy to see you.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Damn, all this overthinking and I still be making dumb decisions.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I was going to cause mischief tonight, but I climbed into my bed instead.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Just landed via Messenger:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

Making waves on YouTube:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Typing in your email address on the TV is a different type of irritation.

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

Coughing has finally overtaken speaking Arabic as the most taboo thing to do in an airport.

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Welcome to your 50s. If you don’t have a mysterious ailment, one will be assigned to you shortly.

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

The sexual tension between me and buying more books.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Life is like a box of chocolates. More expensive than I was expecting.

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

When I was a kid, we still ate noodles. Then at some point we ate pasta. Today, we only eat carbs.

Through repetition and sheer will I’ve mastered gracefully falling on my head.

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

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Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Typing in your email address on the TV is a different type of irritation.

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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