Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.
  • Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza.
  • The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.
  • If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.
  • Babies are undefeated at debate. Their gibberish is too passionate.
  • Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.