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Commentary:
"Ah, the classic love story: First they give you butterflies 🦋, then you end up with a whole garden of mental health problems 🌿🧠. Who knew romance could come with a side of therapy bills? 💔😅"

butterfly, feelings, give, health, humor, love, mental, mental health, problems, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

0

4 months ago

back, bed, fantasy, going, humor, i, morning, procrastination, sleep, tiredness, waking, waking up, woke
I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

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2 months ago

context, expectations, hate, humor, i, know, need, porn, sex, story, why
Do you laugh at your own jokes, or are you emotionally stable?

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4 months ago

emotion, emotionally, humor, joke, jokes, laugh, own, self-awareness, stability, stable
These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

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2 months ago

birthday, calendar, days, Facebook, fun, humor, i, media, online, social, social media, technology
Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

0

2 months ago

activity, car, coffee, coffee cup, cup, everyone, feeling, fun, fun activity, funny idea, humor, idea, interaction, just, lonely, roof, social, social interaction, wave
Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

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2 months ago

enough, friends, humor, i, intervention, life, loneliness, luck, lucky, me, social, social life

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Threads this month:

The longest and most adventurous journeys begin with the words: “I know a shortcut.”

40 shares on Telegram this month:

Me, seeing a man proposing to a woman in public: Hey, this guy bothering you?

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

41 shares on X this month:

The problem with hiding snacks from my kid is that when I forget, they end up being hidden from me too.

59 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Believing that pharmaceutical companies want to heal you is like believing a casino wants you to win.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

25 shares on Slack this month:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

37 shares on Facebook this month:

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Why a bug would spend such a long fraction of its short life immobile on my ceiling beats me.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just sitting on the couch googling if penguins have knees.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

My five-year plan only requires a few acts of God.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

No one talks about the resentment you have towards yourself after you didn’t listen to your gut.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

It was a tough year, but at least I did not buy a Labubu.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Live now on WeChat:

I hate hotel bath towels. So thick and fluffy, I can’t even close my suitcase.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Digging my own grave, because I gotta do everything around here.

Going viral on Telegram:

Everyone hates drama, yet somehow the tabloids remain in business.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Never going into a job interview nervous again, because, wow, it is literally a free invitation to talk about how amazing I am.

Trending via Threads:

My bed has a stronger influence on me than my ambitions.

Going viral on Discord:

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I can’t flirt, but I’ll awkwardly giggle at everything you say.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“I’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Do you laugh at your own jokes, or are you emotionally stable?

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨