343 Funny back quotes

• The shrooms told me that we need to get our shit together. That humanity is a bundle of bad habits. I’m headed back in a few weeks, and they need a response from us. What do I tell them?

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  1 month ago

  back, bad, bad habit, bundle, communication, habit, habits, humanity, humor, i, me, message, mushroom, need, psychedelic, response, self-improvement, shit, tell, together, told, us, weeks

• Currently looking for tickets for the first flight back to the ’90s.

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  1 month ago

  90s, back, flight, humor, looking, nostalgia, ticket, tickets, time, time travel, travel

• Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them.

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  1 month ago

  ahead, back, competition, dad, driving, family, family trip, hard, hate, hour, humor, last, pass, passing, road, road trip, stopping, trip, vehicle

• If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

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  1 month ago

  30, again, agree, anger, back, board, board of directors, chat, communication, conflict, conflict resolution, directors, forgiveness, friends, group, group chat, humor, later, mad, means, minutes, relationship, resolution, told

• My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.

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  1 month ago

  asked, back, came, funny moment, glasses, happening, humor, i, joke, left, literally, misunderstanding, moment, parenting, room, said, today, toddler, zoo

• We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

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  1 month ago

  back, backtalk, beautiful, beauty, behind, compliment, cool, coolness, gossip, humor, irony, talking

• What archaeologists are really looking for is a hand digging back.

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  1 month ago

  archaeologist, back, digging, discovery, excavation, hand, humor, joke, looking

• Do you ever think back about all the crazy stuff you did when you were younger, and wonder how you’re still alive?

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  1 month ago

  adventure, alive, back, crazy, ever, experience, life, life experience, memory, nostalgia, reflection, still, stuff, survival, think, wonder, younger, youth

• Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

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  1 month ago

  back, call, childhood, Facetime, family, humiliating, humiliation, i, me, nephew, relationship, sharing, show, sibling, sibling relationship, technology, toy, toys, video, video call

• If you have nothing nice to say, I promise you that I’ll have something even worse to say back.

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  1 month ago

  argument, attitude, back, comebacks, conversation, even, humor, i, insult, nice, nothing, promise, remark, sarcasm, say, something, witty, witty remark, worse

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