Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who knew driving was the ultimate language lesson? 🚗💬 Just remember, road rage vocabulary count as… 'creative expression', right? 😜🤬"

brain, drive, forget, humor, i, swear, swear word, word, words

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

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2 months ago

cook, cooking, distraction, family, food, humor, kitchen, making, recipe, standing, undisturbed, whole
Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

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2 months ago

cookie, humor, i, indulgence, just, minute, movie, procrastination, self-deception, tell
Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

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2 months ago

always, avoidance, high, high school, humor, ID, me, nostalgia, reunion, saw, school, seen, someone, year’s
Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

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2 months ago

audiobook, awareness, communication, even, humor, listening, reading, room
I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

0

2 months ago

30, break, chore, chores, humor, i, laziness, management, minutes, procrastination, time, time management
God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

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2 months ago

bad, bad idea, charge, charged, free, free will, God, humor, i, idea, irony, philosophy, religion, should

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

You cannot trust me at a zoo because I’ll release the animals.

41 shares on Instagram this month:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

64 shares on WeChat this month:

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

81 shares on X this month:

Absolutely love wanting to do a lot of things and ending up not doing even one! Yay.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

39 shares on TikTok this month:

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Nature just builds 30 foot trees. Without even pulling a permit.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

You can learn a lot about a person by observing their every waking movement from a tree outside their house.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Can you put some pants on my voodoo doll and pop some money in the pocket, please?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Just shared via X:

My goal for next month is small, simple, and clear: change my whole entire life.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

Shared recently on Discord:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Trending via YouTube:

A girl was coming over till she wasn’t—that’s what happened.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Shared recently on X:

They’re making me do work at work.

Spotted on Discord:

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨