Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Ah, the quest for validation knows no boundaries! 🤧🕺 Getting a gold star for basic hygiene? Sign me up! 🌟 Who knew sneezing could be your ticket to glory in the eyes of a preschool teacher! 😂 #SneezeLikeAPro

achievement, elbow, etiquette, humor, i, just, me, praise, preschool, sneeze, teacher, waiting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on YouTube this month:

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

81 shares on Threads this month:

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

My worst fear is dating someone who loves their ex like my exes love me.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

I didn’t get the part of the brain that lets you relax, just the one that overthinks.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

79 shares on Messenger this month:

My favorite date activity is ice skating because I’m really good at it, and it allows me to assert dominance on the ice.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

Vaping always looked dumb. It looks like you’re smoking a kazoo, and now the lead poisoning is the cherry on top.

58 shares on Snapchat this month:

I am like a wildflower, a quiet rebellion blooming through ruins and dust.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Bursting into a million bats the second I see you.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Cafeteria is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

I tried selling my soul to the devil, and he said no.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

Going viral on Twitch:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

Live now on X:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Breaking via Pinterest:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Just shared via TikTok:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Freshly posted on X:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Going viral on Threads:

Being a reader means voluntarily signing up for fictional heartbreak, and then recommending the pain to others.

Going bananas on Twitch:

The divorce process is easier than breaking up with your hair stylist.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Keep the laugh going 😂

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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