I suffer from awesomnia.

I suffer from awesomnia.

Commentary:
Oh, the struggle of being too awesome to fall asleep! 😎💤 Sounds like your coolness is keeping you up at night. Embrace the awesomeness and conquer the day, even on limited sleep! 🌟 #AwesomniaIssues

, , , , , , , ,
New funny quotes →

Advertisement

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Two reasons you never date at work: 1. HR frowns upon it. 2. Your partner gets super pissed.

    Commentary:
    “Want to spice up your work life? Just remember the two golden rules: 1. Keep HR off your back. 2. Avoid turning your office romance into a soap opera drama. 🚫💔 #WorkplaceRomanceDrama”

  • Imagine being hungry and some guy tries to teach you to fish.

    Commentary:
    “Imagine being hangry and some dude busts out a fishing tutorial 🎣😂 Talk about adding insult to hunger! Like, dude, can you just hand over the sushi already? 🍣 #HangryProblems”

  • Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

    Commentary:
    “Remember, the first rule of Fight Club is that everybody is fighting a battle you don’t know about! So next time someone cuts you off in traffic or steals the last slice of pizza, just give them a knowing wink 😉🥊 #BattleOfTheEveryday”

  • The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone just invented the original form of “drop the mic” moment in history! 💦🛁😄 #OopsieDaisies

  • “Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

    Commentary:
    Well, it seems like “charming honesty” has its limits when it comes to job interviews! 🍸💃 Guess it’s time to swap those weaknesses for something a bit more work-appropriate, like saying you’re “too detail-oriented” or “overly passionate about excel spreadsheets.” Remember, save the fun stuff for the office holiday party! 😉

  • Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

    Commentary:
    Oh, Twitter – the land of hot takes and questionable decisions! 🐦🔥 It’s like a chaotic party where the only rule is “tweet now, think later.” 🎉🤔 Who knew 280 characters could cause so much trouble? 😂 Just remember, sometimes it’s best to have a chaperone in the form of common sense! 🤓🚨 #TweetResponsibly