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Commentary:
"Ah, the mysterious case of the poultrygeist! 👻🐔 Can you imagine a ghostly chicken haunting the dinner table of a vegetarian? Better watch out for those clucking spirits! 🍗😱"

chicken, diet, fish, humor, pescatarian, poultrygeist, pun, vegetarian

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

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2 months ago

flex, growth, humor, real, resilience, turn, wisdom, wounds
What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

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2 months ago

ask, beginner, beginner question, being, curiosity, funny question, getting, humor, just, nosy, question, someone
I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

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2 months ago

activity, dating, fun, fun activity, home, i, kids, marriage, night, relationship, singles, singles night, surprise, thought, wife
My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

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2 months ago

birthday, celebration, everyone, humor, ignore, self-deprecation, wish
Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

0

2 months ago

age, birthday, grow, growth, health, healthy, humor, older, people, researcher
Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

0

2 months ago

calory, cheese, diet, humor, me, politics, promise, vote

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

21 shares on Slack this month:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

25 shares on Discord this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just here unloading my dishwasher.

28 shares on Slack this month:

First date idea: we search for each other’s criminal history together.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

18 shares on Telegram this month:

US etiquette question: Do you need to tip the guy at the border who reads your last five years of social media history?

64 shares on Telegram this month:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

When you first meet a man, that fake version of him be so fire.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

If we’re living in a dystopian nightmare, where the hell is my housekeeping robot?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need a new identity and a passport.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here eating Nutella from the jar with a spoon.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

TikTok? I still call it a watch.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

Seen just now on Facebook:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

Trending via Instagram:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Making waves on Messenger:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

Just shared via Instagram:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age.

Going viral on Instagram:

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

Shared recently on Threads:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

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Activity Log ✨

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨