If you’re a dude and you’re having a bad day, just remember, no one cares.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Eat like your treadmill is watching.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Theo Von’s entire life is like a raccoon that visits New York City.