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I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

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Went for a walk. Very pleasant evening. The squirrels and rabbits kept running away from me. That stung a little. I will remember their faces.

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Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

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Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

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Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

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Sharpening pencils at the bin was the biggest link-up.

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Hundreds, nay, thousands of movies about falling in love but only one movie about a beach that makes you old.

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Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.

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โ€œIโ€™ve tasted going back to an ex, and Iโ€™ve tasted trying to fix a relationship before it breaks. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 10 p.m.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฝ has copied:

Itโ€™s crazy that you donโ€™t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

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Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

Commentary:
Guess that person really needed a saucy hobby! ๐Ÿฅš๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿฅ„



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