Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

The question is, what will kill humanity this century? Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Was in a bookshop and asked a worker if he could recommend books to me. He said, ‘Sure, they’re great.’

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I am thick and tired.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,704

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Getting accused of using AI when you didn’t is like this century’s version of a witch allegation.

Just landed via Twitch:

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

Just shared via Discord:

This time last night, there was a spider so big in my bathroom it put me under a glass on a postcard and carried me out.

Spotted on Slack:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

The second cup of coffee does for me what a can of spinach does for Popeye.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The problem with believing that nothing matters except you, is that eventually everyone will just leave you alone to take extra special care of yourself.

Shared recently on Slack:

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

Going viral on YouTube:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

0
In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the infamous algebra, always playing hard to get in real life! 🤔📚 Who needs those pesky equations when you have hilarious word problems like trying to figure out why your cat insists on knocking things off the counter? 🐱🤯 Stay tuned for the next episode of 'The Unsolvable Mysteries of Everyday Life!' 🔍😂"

, , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

75 shares on Snapchat this month:

I have the sex drive of a potato.

56 shares on Discord this month:

The Jaws theme stays on during sex.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

Was in a bookshop and asked a worker if he could recommend books to me. He said, ‘Sure, they’re great.’

48 shares on Instagram this month:

Guys will say, “I know a spot,” and then take you on a downward spiral.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

64 shares on Pinterest this month:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

Uber sends notifications like “Hey, want to take an Uber right now?” No thanks, buddy. It’s more for when I need to go somewhere.

43 shares on Twitch this month:

Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

16 shares on Slack this month:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Marriage is scary, what if he doesn’t want our house to look like my Pinterest board.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss you (the money I spent).

19 folks are currently checking 👀

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband loves when we fight, and I turn it into a limited series called And Another Thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,679

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Hardly a day goes by without me being reminded that an academic degree has nothing to do with intelligence.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

My favorite part about having a Peloton is telling people I have a Peloton.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Making waves on Reddit:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Spotted on Messenger:

Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Just shared via X:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Going viral on Discord:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Seen just now on YouTube:

The holidays may be over by my work ethic is still out of the office.

Seen just now on Instagram:

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

You know those couples who share their food? I mean, what kind of people are they? Aren’t they hungry?

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴