Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Flying bugs can basically go anywhere they want, but still choose to fly right into your face.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Let’s go out for carrots sometime.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Just came back from my walk, and I was right about everything.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

“I bought this while depressed” should be an acceptable reason to get a full refund on a return.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Gravity, at all times, is trying to pull your pants down.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Dec 22, 2025

3,607

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Ask your doctor if it’s right for you to eat oranges and pretend they’re planets and you’re a Greek god.

Shared recently on Threads:

I appreciate all clouds. Fluffy, non-fluffy… it’s how Bob Ross would’ve wanted it.

Just shared via Instagram:

I wonder how long you could drive in a roundabout before a cop would be like, hey, you can’t do that anymore.

Trending via Twitch:

Seeing yourself on a FaceTime screenshot really humbles you.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

2 months ago

0

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the infamous algebra, always playing hard to get in real life! 🤔📚 Who needs those pesky equations when you have hilarious word problems like trying to figure out why your cat insists on knocking things off the counter? 🐱🤯 Stay tuned for the next episode of 'The Unsolvable Mysteries of Everyday Life!' 🔍😂"

algebra, assurance, humor, i, irony, life, real, real life, thing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

0

2 weeks ago

anything, excited, excitement, humor, laziness, procrastination, sarcasm, super, today
When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

0

1 month ago

drain, energy, energy drain, fat, fatigue, humor, humor quote, life, motivation, people, sarcasm, self-care, should, suck, take, too, witty
I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

1

1 month ago

dependency, engine, facts, Google, hope, humor, i, internet, know, knowledge, learning, maybe, never, search, search engine, six, technology, things
I think it’s sad that getting married is one of the only ways to guarantee somebody will be forced to make a speech about how great you are.

0

2 months ago

forced, getting, great, guarantee, humor, i, marriage, married, relationship, sad, somebody, speech, think
Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

0

1 month ago

1, away, call, country, home, laptop, left, ms, MS Teams, remote, remote work, say, second, Teams, technology, video, video call, work, work from home
I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

0

1 month ago

air, bag, chip, chips, company, enough, humor, i, joke, kind, little, parody, playful, potato, potato chip, put, satire, snack, snack humor, today, well

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Threads this month:

Meetings are a wonderful way to help your employees take a break from being productive.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

Once you’ve read the dictionary, every other book you read is just a remix.

85 shares on Threads this month:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Parenthood is so crazy. We’re really out here getting bullied by the people we made.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

You’d think a philharmonic orchestra would have at least one harmonica, but nope.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Getting old would be so fun if you didn’t wake up each morning with neck pain that suggests you slept hanging upside down like a bat.

14 shares on WeChat this month:

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter sucks so much, but randomly there are such funny tweets, so I wait, like a frog, for one delicious fly.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Y’all screenshot payment confirmations to make sure they don’t play with y’all too?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Men: Masters of multitasking – can watch sports, ignore laundry, and forget your birthday, all at once.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun like a LinkedIn notification.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

4,079

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

My therapist is fluffy and walks on four paws.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Dear razor commercials, please stop shaving hairless legs. If you want to impress someone, shave a gorilla.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Major cheat code in life: ask for the big, unreasonable thing. The universe meets you at your level of audacity.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

“This too shall pass.” And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never f**king ends.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Threads:

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

Seen just now on Discord:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Trending via Instagram:

My teen would like you to know I ruined her life when I did her laundry today.

Going viral on Instagram:

Should I be worried that buzzards circle me when I go for a run?

Shared recently on Twitch:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Trending via Messenger:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Making waves on Threads:

My girlfriend confided in me she loves when I blow air on her when she’s hot, but honestly, I’m not a fan.

Just shared via Instagram:

First rule for the new year is to not dwell on what went wrong this year.

Trending via X:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

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