Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Nowadays you don’t even have to go to the zoo. A trip to the mall is enough.
  • I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.
  • Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.
  • Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.
  • I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.
  • Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.