Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

You’re telling me people get eight hours of sleep? Like in one night?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I told a joke to my boss, and he must have found it really funny because now I get to tell it to HR.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

The guy that said laughter is the best medicine obviously wasn’t suffering from diarrhea.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

The fatigue is reaching levels that shouldn’t even be possible.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

When something Asian becomes popular enough, it becomes Mexican.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,710

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Shared recently on Slack:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Shared recently on YouTube:

My playlist so bipolar. We either in love, depressed, or gang members.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Whoever is dating my ex, all I can say is: cheat first!

Going viral on Telegram:

Finally my winter fat has gone. I now have spring rolls.

Seen just now on Threads:

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

Spotted on TikTok:

If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sibling love: when "I got your back" becomes "I got your back because I pushed you out of the way first!" 😂🤷‍♂️👫

dislike, family, humor, irony, love, proof, relationships, same, siblings, someone, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

0

2 months ago

bar, dog, expectations, greet, home, humor, i, impossible, should, wife
Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

0

2 months ago

activity, back, digital, digital life, hi, humor, internet, internet humor, know, leaving, life, me, media, online, online activity, place, returning, self-deprecating, social, social media, stupid, user
The best plans on a Friday night are no plans.

0

3 months ago

best, downtime, Friday, Friday night, introvert, leisure, night, plan, plans, relaxation, weekend
Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

0

2 months ago

antique, auction, bidding, humor, joke, me, observation, people, self-deprecation, show
Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

0

2 months ago

advice, comments, humor, i, just, media, post, social, social media, therapist
I’m perverted, but in an elegant and whimsical way.

0

3 weeks ago

elegant, humor, personality, perverted, whimsical

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on YouTube this month:

I may be a chaotic mess, but then so is quantum physics.

57 shares on Slack this month:

My girlfriend just had a go at me for not glistening, whatever that is.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

27 shares on Discord this month:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

45 shares on Instagram this month:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

75 shares on Threads this month:

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

46 shares on Twitch this month:

When the salesman from the hearing aid company calls, I stay on the line and answer every question with ‘What?’

85 shares on Facebook this month:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they’re having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

The worst part about working from home is that your real husband is also your work husband.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

No one warned me that being an adult was mostly just hurrying up to get somewhere you don’t want to go in the first place.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Whoever said diamonds are a girl’s best friend clearly has never met shredded cheese.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Just shared via Reddit:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Do vape shops and nail salons actually make money, or is my town’s economy one big laundering scheme?

Trending via Messenger:

Can I sell my feelings on ebay, I don’t want them anymore.

Shared recently on Reddit:

They need to invent a dishwasher with a window on it. I have to know what goes on in there.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I enjoy long, romantic walks … to the departure gate.

Trending via Slack:

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Just shared via Messenger:

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

The best plans on a Friday night are no plans.

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

I’m perverted, but in an elegant and whimsical way.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨