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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I do love being the only person who knows exactly what I mean and the hidden meaning behind everything I do.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

We need to stop telling AI that it’s paintings are bad. That’s how Hitler got started.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

You don’t see guys traveling around on those seesaw-type push carts on railroad tracks anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,334

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

Just shared via WeChat:

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Going bananas on Reddit:

Every day Facebook tells me I have memories and wants to show them to me. It’s like they have no appreciation for the cost or the amount of liquor I needed to erase them.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Live now on Slack:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Trending via YouTube:

The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I don’t fight my demons anymore. We collaborate.

Spotted on Threads:

If you see this, straighten your back, you banana-shaped mess.

Breaking via YouTube:

A general rule of parenting: if you’re having a great day, the day isn’t old enough yet.

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the magical moment when you embark on a journey to Flavor Town, known as chewphoria! 🍔🎉 It's like a burst of happiness with every munch, a symphony of flavors dancing in your mouth! Just remember to chew, not swoon! 😋 #ChewphoriaGoals"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

Having divorced parents as an adult is funny because you and your siblings are like, “Damn, who has custody of Mom today?”

19 shares on TikTok this month:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

24 shares on Messenger this month:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

37 shares on Slack this month:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

I do not have a “body count.” I have a curious spirit.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m already sick of tomorrow.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

73 shares on X this month:

I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

When a man gets married he has a moral obligation to scare his wife when he sneezes.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

AirPods are hungry for earwax. It’s your job to feed them.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

We all know that mirrors don’t lie. I’m just very grateful that they don’t laugh.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re like if “nope” was a person.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,405

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Thinking of you while I’m chopping onions.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Tech bro obsessed with “storytelling,” but hasn’t read a book in the last 5 years.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Most guys probably just have a foot fetish because their first girlfriend was a sock.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Why do chefs always have to cut everything so fast? It’s just an onion man, why don’t you relax?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

My wallet is empty, just like my soul.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Just shared via Slack:

Buying something nice for myself, cuz today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Petition to allow customer service employees to fight at least one customer per day.

Trending via TikTok:

You see how in cartoons, when they’re hungry, their friends start looking like a chicken leg? That’s how ovulation feels.

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

Trending via WhatsApp:

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

Trending via Pinterest:

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

Seen just now on Slack:

Home is where you trust the toilet seats.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I love saying “You’re welcome!” really loudly when someone hasn’t thanked me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just water.

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