Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?
  • “You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.
  • I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?
  • In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.
  • It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.
  • Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.