13 funny climate quotes - Wordgag

So, does anyone know how to end mass religious psychosis, or is it just a thing now until we slowly die off from climate-induced disasters?

May 19, 2026

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Apr 1, 2026

The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.

Apr 1, 2026

I’m old enough to remember when the hole in the ozone layer killed us all off.

Mar 31, 2026

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

Mar 31, 2026

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

Mar 29, 2026

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

Mar 29, 2026

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Mar 28, 2026

When life gives you lemons maybe think to yourself, “that’s really quite remarkable given how far I live from a climate capable of growing citrus.”

Mar 28, 2026

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Mar 26, 2026

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Mar 25, 2026

Everyone talks about climate change, but no one has the courage to sacrifice a virgin to appease the gods.

Mar 25, 2026

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Mar 25, 2026