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Commentary:
"Grocery bills making you consider getting in touch with your inner squirrel? 🌰🐿️ Maybe acorns are the next big culinary trend! Who needs avocado toast when you can have acorn specialties instead? 😆 #BudgetFriendlyEating"

acorns, budgeting, economics, food, grocery, humor, me, price, taste, thinking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

0

2 months ago

better, confidence, doing, hate, here, humor, imagine, irony, job, just, me, much, myself, over, sarcasm, self-hate, self-improvement
The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

0

2 months ago

call, communication, ever, humor, i, joke, just, marital, marital joke, marriage, only, person, phone, relationship, trying, wife
How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

0

2 months ago

blood, drinking, enjoy, enjoyment, hot, humor, insomnia, keep, me, night, summer, thoughts, vampire
Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

0

2 months ago

career, dating, humor, job, just, market, relationship, right, same, scene, stay, where
When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

0

5 months ago

aspiration, grow, humor, i, ID, lottery, lottery winner, retirement, winner, wish
Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

0

2 months ago

bro, events, fine, impossible, just, need, odds, order, perfect, play, sequence

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on Slack this month:

Nothing is impossible, except for my daughter returning home with the hat and gloves she wore to school this morning.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

The spelling of “bourgeoisie” was intended as yet another means of oppression.

21 shares on Threads this month:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The difference between me and Superman is that he has super vision, and I need supervision.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

67 shares on Discord this month:

Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

33 shares on Slack this month:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

96 shares on WeChat this month:

Every millennial is now paying Apple $9.99/month for 2TB just to not delete their life.

37 shares on TikTok this month:

I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

91 shares on Slack this month:

A job interview is basically a conversation between two liars.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Hear me out. A waiting room where the doctors wait.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

My middle finger salutes you.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I can feel your energy from two planets away.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Just shared via TikTok:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Making waves on X:

Shared recently on Facebook:

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

Making waves on X:

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

Trending via WeChat:

I can’t think of a single email that has ever found me well.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I need a job with a salary that’ll shock me every month.

Spotted on Threads:

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Broadcasted on Slack:

“What’s your ETA?” do you ask the birds in the sky when they will arrive.

Going bananas on Discord:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨