Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.
  • Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.
  • The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.
  • Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.
  • Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.
  • Don’t blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August.