Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Feels like the Chinese government turned up the power on the sleepy ray they use on me every morning.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Getting older is sexy. You moan more.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Every time a bird poops on my car, I eat a plate of wings on the front porch to show them what I’m capable of.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

The person who invented bowling: “Oh, and we’ll make them wear different shoes for no reason. Clown shoes.”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,654

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Job hunting: the ultimate game of hide and seek where you're the seeker in denial 🤦‍♂️🔍💼

dislike, employment, frustration, humor, hunting, job, job hunting, knowing, want, work, worst

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

1 month ago
aging, fruit, humor, perspective, raisin, still, sweet, sweetness, wrinkle, wrinkles
Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

1 month ago
boiling, boiling water, coping, coping mechanism, dealing, girlhood, hot, humor, life, mechanism, self-care, shower, sitting, water
It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

1 month ago
before, Earth, generation, humor, internet, know, last, lite, media, nostalgia, realization, realize, social, social media, technology, weird
I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

1 month ago
ache, another, bowl, cream, dessert, eating, eating habits, food, food logic, habits, humor, i, ice, ice cream, indulgence, logic, me, stomach, stomach ache, sure, think
Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

5 days ago
complaint, fast, fast food, food, fry, humor, McDonald’s, needs, road, salt, SALTS, seasoning
Last night’s dream could have been an email.

4 months ago
communication, dream, email, humor, last, night, nights, sleep, technology

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Feeling morally and spiritually adrift without a Sunday HBO show.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m not a very good poker player cause my eyes turn into big dollar signs when I see that I have a good hand.

Making waves on Reddit:

A.I. should be forced to wait tables before it’s allowed to make art.

Spotted on Discord:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Making waves on WeChat:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

Breaking via WeChat:

Liking sports is great because you’ll have a bad day, then here your team comes to make it worse.

Making waves on WeChat:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

Why do I gotta dress for success? Maybe success could be the one who puts a little more into this relationship.

As I’m moonwalking away, they didn’t even notice I had stolen a brownie.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m not speaking to my husband, and I don’t think he even knows it.

“Where did all your money go?” I’m either wearing it or eating it.

My therapist said this to me, and it hit me like a brick: “They’re not your friends if they disagree with you or try to challenge you.”

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My DNA came back saying I come from a wide selection of cheeses.

I’m seriously considering adoption. Who wants me?

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

There’s something meditative about cleaning. It’s the perfect time to reflect and plan revenge on every single person who has ever wronged you.

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Before I die, I’m going to arrange for a friend to take my phone, and after the funeral, text everybody to say “thanks for coming” and other assorted messages of appreciation.

I was dropped as an adult.

We work all week to work some more around the house all weekend long. Isn’t life grand?

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏