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New funny quotes: 11320 this month

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Updated: May 26, 2026

 

 

 

 

39 Funny employment quotes

Funny employment quotes bring a splash of humor to the daily grind šŸ˜‚šŸ’¼ Whether you’re stuck in meetings or powering through emails, these witty gems remind us that work doesn’t have to be all serious business. Ready to laugh your way through the 9-to-5 hustle? Let’s dive into some clever and relatable quips that make clocking in a little more enjoyable! ā°šŸ¤£āœØ

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Posted onMay 26, 2026

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

People who quit their jobs before having a backup job lined up ain’t scared of nothing.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

8 year gap on resume that just says ā€œkarateā€.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

ā€œThose tattoos will make it harder to get a job!ā€ Okay, well so will my personality.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Lie during your job interview because they’re lying to you about their great work environment.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that ā€œpeople with tattoos can’t get good jobsā€ and now we all agree that ā€œpeople with and without tattoos can’t get good jobsā€.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

No LinkedIn, I am not ā€œopen to work,ā€ I am required to work.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Interviewer: Can I get you anything? Me: Yeah, a job!

Posted onMay 21, 2026

AI is trained on what we write, so if we want to save our jobs we should all write really badly for a while. I’ve been doing my bit for years.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Love when job applications ask for my desired salary so I can choose between not being hired and being exploited for my work.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

We can’t all be underemployed creatives. Someone in the group chat needs to know what an insurance is.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Can somebody explain to me why it’s bad if immigrants take our jobs, but it’s good if AI does?

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

Posted onMay 18, 2026

Having a job is insane because they give you actual money in exchange for pressing the buttons.

Posted onMay 6, 2026

I would do anything for a job, except write a cover letter.

Posted onMay 6, 2026

People say 70-80 year olds are unemployable because of mental decline, yet somehow they’re running all the countries.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

New term for people with jobs: emploids.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

A political guy who supports communism because he hates applying for jobs and just wants to be assigned somewhere.

Posted onMar 31, 2026

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

If a company’s hiring sign says, ā€œCome grow with us,ā€ you’re about to do the work of 3-5 people.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

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