Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

I’m not good at quickly making up derogatory names on the fly, unless I’m driving.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Songs discovered from movies are usually a masterpiece.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

My OnlyFans is just me loading the dishwasher correctly.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I’m so thankful I live on the planet that has pizza.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,682

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Nothing is funnier than seeing how angry someone gets when they realize they can’t manipulate you.

Making waves on YouTube:

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Living in your parent’s house is free because you pay with your soul.

Live now on X:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Just landed via Twitch:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Going viral on Telegram:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Just shared via Slack:

I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.

Just shared via YouTube:

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

You are the Monday of my life.

2 months ago

0

You are the Monday of my life.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic Monday – the day we love to hate! But hey, just like Mondays, you bring a fresh start and endless possibilities! 💼☕️ Embrace the chaos and spontaneity that comes with being the Monday of someone's life! 🌟 #MondayMotivation"

comparison, day, feelings, humor, life, Monday, negativity, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

0

2 months ago

always, attractive, barbecue, cooking, dating, food, forget, humor, pheromones, scent, smells
Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

0

2 months ago

being, gracefully, happiness, happy, health, humor, insane, insanity, joy, life, mental, mental health, secret, self-acceptance, uniqueness
Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

0

2 months ago

everything, existence, humor, irony, leave, life, nothing, perspective, strange, struggle, world
Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

0

2 months ago

always, country, humor, i, Italy, love, romance, truly, wordplay
Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

0

2 months ago

before, came, communication, heads, just, media, nonsense, people’s, people’s heads, social, social media, thoughts, Twitter
It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

0

2 months ago

humor, hurricane, i, irony, language, letter, middle, pretty, wit, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Snapchat this month:

Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

42 shares on X this month:

The difference between me and Superman is that he has super vision, and I need supervision.

92 shares on Reddit this month:

Adulting has stunned me into silence. I have no thoughts, no remarks and no commentary at the moment.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

Put my height in bio. Hope it lands me a girlfriend.

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

95 shares on Messenger this month:

The world would be a much nicer place if we just turn off the news.

33 shares on Discord this month:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

76 shares on Threads this month:

I’m looking for insults so intelligent you don’t realize you’ve been roasted until three thoughts later.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the spooky thing in the woods that you wish to see in the world.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

A delivery driver just asked for my date of birth. I said, “94.” He replied, “Is that 1994?” Oh, sorry mate, no. My bad, that was 1794. Right around the French Revolution.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a small lifestyle change that has an instantaneous, huge payoff.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,616

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

You should be allowed to call out of work if you have a really bad nightmare.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

My birth year getting a lil too far on those lil scroll lists. I don’t like that.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

That awkward moment when someone keeps watching you while you are eating.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

So I just checked my bank account, and it looks like for Christmas I am getting everyone the thought that counts.

Trending via Messenger:

Unpopular activity: minding your own business.

Just landed via Discord:

If a tree falls in a forest and doesn’t make a sound, maybe that’s where your kid should be practicing the piano.

Just shared via Slack:

I see why grandmas used to cook dinner at 3 p.m. and sit down the rest of the day.

Trending via Snapchat:

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

Making waves on Messenger:

This tape doesn’t even taste like scotch.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

Shared recently on Facebook:

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

Trending via YouTube:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Trending via YouTube:

Unfortunately for everyone, I will keep doing whatever I want.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴