Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.
  • I hate people that talk to their Apple watch. Fake Power Rangers.
  • My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.
  • My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.
  • I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.
  • I don’t make mistakes, I date them.