Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.
  • Can you lose weight by running away from your feelings?
  • Stick with me and you’ll go places. None of them good, but still.
  • I want my name to come up when you go to confession.
  • Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.
  • How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?