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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Do not EVER text while driving. Please use the giant iPad attached to your dashboard.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,994

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

Shared recently on X:

I came, I saw, I was disappointed, so I left.

Just shared via Messenger:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Trending via WhatsApp:

People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

Breaking via Discord:

Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I’ve calculated my December budget and realized I can only afford to pray.

Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you're just an obstacle on their path to world domination 😂👶💪

baby, determination, face, grab, humor, just, literally, mischief, parenting, step, toddler, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

1 month ago

another, chocolate, energy, enough, humor, indulgence, just, motivation, piece, snack, sweets, take, temptation
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

3 months ago

devil, eating, ever, food, good, humor, making, taste, temptation, trick, unhealthy, unhealthy eating, unhealthy food
When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

1 month ago

eye, humor, joke, lemon, life, prank, someone, squirt
There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

2 months ago

dating, first month, good, humor, love, man, month, months, nothing, person, personality, pretending, relationship, romance, still
I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

1 month ago

annoyed, catch, Covid, explain, feelings, health, humor, i, irony, kind, once, pandemic, rude, still
You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

1 month ago

appreciation, cha, cha cha cha, creativity, explaining, expression, fun, humor, nobody, sentence, want, yourself

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

ChatGPT, what do you do when you find out your boyfriend’s been using ChatGPT to write you messages?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Santa baby, slip some mental stability under the tree, for me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

No one is more stressed than someone who has seen their potential and knows they aren’t living up to it.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Making waves on Reddit:

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and have kids before 25. Because after that, our brain starts working, and the decision won’t seem so reasonable anymore.

Trending via Discord:

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Broadcasted on Discord:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

Making waves on Facebook:

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Your pronouns are “side/chick”.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

Mid-life crisis? No, no, mid-day crisis. Something happens every day.

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

We go together like Drunk and Disorderly.

Silence is golden. But duct tape is silver.

You ever liked a song so much you restart it before it even finishes?

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

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Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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