Trendy Funny Quotes

  • While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.
  • I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.
  • Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.
  • Life is short, flirt with me!
  • Everybody loves that comfort food until you end up with that comfort body.
  • Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.