Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.
  • Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.
  • Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.
  • Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.
  • Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.
  • Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.