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"Remember, it's cheaper to buy a new set of bones than to fix a broken heart! 💔💪 Breakups just got a whole lot more practical! #BoneStrong"

anatomy, bones, break, heart, humor, love, pain, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

2 months ago

construction, day, historical, historical reference, humor, i, job, know, reference, Rome, sarcasm, wit
Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

1 month ago

amount, boss, day, five, give, high, high five, humor, humorous, humorous quote, i, job, joke, motivation, motivational, motivational prank, office, office humor, prank, workplace, workplace joke
Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

2 months ago

best, culture, Ferrari, food, humor, irony, Japan, mexican, Mexican food, never, point, take, toilets, track, tragedy
I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

1 month ago

aging, breaking, humor, i, knees, noise, prepared, someone, sound, spaghetti, stairs, time
I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

1 month ago

able, attention, attention span, being, check, complete, curiosity, distraction, feet, focus, hours, i, just, legs, miss, penguin, phone, procrastination, read, reading, sentence, span, study
Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

1 month ago

asked, awkward, awkward moment, cooking, food, funny response, hobby, humor, i, lasagna, me, moment, panic, response, someone

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

My love language is being sent money.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

First World War. Kind of nervous.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

Freshly posted on Discord:

Me, to the printer: “Hey, could you print this out for me?” Printer: “Sure, but first I’ll show you all the sounds I can make.”

Broadcasted on Reddit:

The older I get, the more I respect Sleeping Beauty. She took one look at the world and said, “Nah.”

Going viral on WeChat:

Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all day if you’re constantly holding a coffee cup?

Trending via Messenger:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Trending via Messenger:

If small talk burned calories, maybe I’d consider it.

Going viral on Twitch:

Donuts have holes in them, just like acoustic guitars, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end.

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Activity Log ✨

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

British people be like “I’m Bri ish” cause they drank the “T”

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m starting to think the voice in my head doesn’t like me very much.

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

Had the bed all to myself last night, so you know what that means… I slept in a slightly different spot, and now my neck feels weird.

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a boy that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

Imagine hating me, and I’m just here unloading my dishwasher.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%.

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

Don’t give up on your dreams. Go back to bed.

I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

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Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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