Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Saw the eye doctor, and that’s 90% of the vision test right there.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

The morning routine that takes the longest: finding the will to live.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

If I get rid of social media, how will I know what everyone ate for dinner?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

She said she liked animals but apparently all the fruit flies around my apartment was a “turn off”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

234 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,503

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,503

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,478

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Messenger:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Just landed via Facebook:

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

Trending via Pinterest:

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If I say “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared research, data, charts and I will totally prove you wrong.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Imagine if all the money spent on AI was spent on trains.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Born to be a hater, forced to understand your perspective.

Shared recently on X:

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

Seen just now on Facebook:

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Everyone is all “love is patient” during the wedding, but when there’s a long line for the open bar, not so much.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Love is patient, but a free bar test our patience faster than a wedding toast 🥂😅 #PrioritiesShiftWhenDrinksAreInvolved"

bar, everyone, expectation, humor, irony, line, love, open, open bar, patient, relationship, wedding

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

0

2 months ago

couch, expression, health, humor, media, mental, mental health, online, online therapy, social, social media, therapist, therapy, Twitter
Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

0

2 months ago

afford, affordability, dream, dream house, estate, every, house, humor, irony, perspective, real, real estate, wishes
My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

0

2 months ago

comedy, desire, health, humor, information, information overload, informed, irony, mental, mental health, odds, overload, sane, stress
Once you love wide-leg pants, there is no going back from that.

0

3 months ago

back, clothing, fashion, going, love, once, pant, pants, style, trend, wide-leg, wide-leg pant
Sorry I marked myself as safe on Facebook after your PowerPoint presentation.

0

2 months ago

Facebook, humor, i, joke, media, myself, PowerPoint, presentation, safe, sarcasm, social, social media, sorry, work
Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

0

2 months ago

butt, confidence, fun, humor, love, own, positivity, self-love

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on X this month:

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m already far too stressed as it is. And then you also have to have time to just sit there and do nothing.

53 shares on Instagram this month:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

78 shares on Discord this month:

Life is short, flirt with me!

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

78 shares on Twitch this month:

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

If I was on Love Island, I would get wasted and drown in the pool, altering the course of every contestant’s life forever.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

He’s a 10, but it’s the pain scale.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Be the one that gets asked to remove the hockey mask, during a conference call, on Friday the 13th.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Pretty sure the best place to hide a dead body is in a new tab you opened to read later.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

My favorite dinner is the one made by someone else.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

My laptop is overheating because I am doing a really good job.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Oh, him? He’s my insignificant other.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

Making waves on Messenger:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Going viral on Threads:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Trending via TikTok:

If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

You can always tell it’s Monday because nobody’s smiling.

Seen just now on X:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If craziness could fly, some people would have their own airport.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone is all “love is patient” during the wedding, but when there’s a long line for the open bar, not so much.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

Once you love wide-leg pants, there is no going back from that.

Sorry I marked myself as safe on Facebook after your PowerPoint presentation.

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨