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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I’m going to need to rewatch Idiocracy to see what happens next.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

My worst fear is dating someone who loves their ex like my exes love me.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,945

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Ok, I cheated in school, but I did it the hard way and without AI.

Just shared via Twitch:

Hey, man, we’re worshiping a false god later. If you wanna pull up.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

Trending via Telegram:

No ChatGPT for me, thanks. I will be asking Liam Gallagher on Twitter.

Just shared via Facebook:

Not to brag, but I’m on hold and my call is important to them.

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When that "I’m sorry" hits harder than your toughest pose 😂💔 #GangsterLife ✌️

apology, attitude, gangster, humor, interaction, say, saying, saying sorry, social, social interaction, sorry, toughness

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

3 months ago

condiment, cooking, exaggeration, food, humor, i, kitchen, know, love, much, sauce, seasoning, soy, soy sauce, taste, too
Twitter is like attaching a message to a balloon, hoping that the right person somehow finds and reads it.

3 months ago

analogy, balloon, communication, finds, hope, hoping, humor, internet, media, message, person, right, social, social media, Twitter
I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

2 months ago

cleaning, dog, dogs, dropped, dropped food, food, humor, i, joke, people, pet, pick, responsibility
If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

1 month ago

announcement, change, changing, conversation, family, holiday, humor, politics, pregnancy, pregnant, subject, subject change, talking, Thanksgiving
I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

1 month ago

dosage, health, humor, i, irony, meds, mental, mental health, positivity, raise, still
The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

1 month ago

dumb, dumbest, humor, irony, loud, opinions, people, politics

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

I be like, “Who’s praying on my downfall?” as if I don’t make self-destructive life decisions.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Don’t think of it as losing followers, think of it as frustrating bots to the point they go away.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

My new diet plan is to hibernate and live off all this fat I’ve accumulated.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

Just landed via Reddit:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Going bananas on Pinterest:

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Making waves on Slack:

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

Just landed via Discord:

The IRS needs special envelopes for when you’re not in trouble.

Trending via YouTube:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

Remembering my youth, and a time where I could breath out of more than one nostril at once.

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.

Today feels like a good day for a cheeseburger.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

If you keep the house dark, not only do you save on electricity, but it also looks cleaner.

I ordered one of those Tempura mattresses. Way too crunchy.

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

The purpose of life is to go insane sooner or later.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

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Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

Twitter is like attaching a message to a balloon, hoping that the right person somehow finds and reads it.

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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