596 Funny sarcasm quotes

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  1 week ago

  View →: I’m not falling for it again. These missions have been successful 8 times already.
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  1 week ago

  View →: You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.
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  1 week ago

  View →: Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.
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  1 week ago

  View →: If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.
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  1 week ago

  View →: I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.
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  1 week ago

  View →: Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.
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  1 week ago

  View →: I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.
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  1 week ago

  View →: I’m tired of things costing money.
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  1 week ago

  View →: This is my phone. I text back when I want to.
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  1 week ago

  View →: So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.
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  1 week ago

  View →: I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.
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  1 week ago

  View →: “She’s so self-centered.” Who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?
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  1 week ago

  View →: I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.
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  1 week ago

  View →: I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.
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  1 week ago

  View →: My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”
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  1 week ago

  View →: Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: I only look up to people that are taller than me and really that’s about the extent of it.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: I’m sorry for inventing the universe.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: “Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: “Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: The lion doesn’t concern itself with the contents of your prior email.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: People in their 20s be like, “This is my emotional support master’s degree.”
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: God, please — if you don’t want someone to love me, at least make me a millionaire.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

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