Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

God, please — if you don’t want someone to love me, at least make me a millionaire.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isn’t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,617

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Every day is leg day when you’re running from your problems.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Making waves on Threads:

If you aren’t sleeping with me, then you’re sleeping against me.

Trending via WeChat:

Have you ever been sitting around overthinking about overthinking, and then wonder why you’re even thinking that?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Just shared via Discord:

Adulthood – a never-ending story of shit you have to do.

Making waves on X:

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

Going viral on YouTube:

Never underestimate the healing power of a grilled cheese sandwich.

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Good morning, you charismatic cynic!🌞😜 May your day be as bright and sassy as your sarcasm!😏 #SarcasmGoals"

good, greeting, humor, morning, personality, sarcastic, sunshine, wit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

0

5 months ago

cost, cost of living, economy, expensive, food, food price, humor, i, inflation, irony, just, living, love, minimum, minimum wage, policy, price, raise, wage, wage policy
Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.

0

3 weeks ago

actually, artist, daily, daily habit, day, exaggeration, habit, i, listen, listening, literally, me, music, never, special, Spotify, Spotify Wrapped, streaming, talent, telling, times, wrapped
I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

0

1 month ago

better, humor, i, making, me, resolution, Resolutions, self-improvement, think, time, year’s
Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

0

2 months ago

accidentally, best, bottle, humor, invention, meds, mix, packing, trail, trail mix, trip
If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

0

2 months ago

again, dating, dead, disturb, ghost, ghosts, humor, never, relationship, respect, someone
The first bowl of cereal makes you want a second, but the second makes you wish you stopped at the first.

0

2 months ago

appetite, bowl, breakfast, cereal, eating, regret, second, snack, stopped, want, wish

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Slack this month:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

79 shares on Slack this month:

Seeing a grown man stumble when the train moves is disgusting. How will you provide for anyone?

13 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

54 shares on Slack this month:

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t play with the feelings I barely have.

35 shares on YouTube this month:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

71 shares on Threads this month:

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

Gordon Ramsay is only funny because he’s not talking to me like that.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

‘I love reading!’ says the woman who loves owning books.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Just seen the cost of funerals and no wonder people are living longer.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Someone asked me if I had plans for the fall. It took me a moment to realize they meant “Autumn,” not the collapse of civilization.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I’m equally comfortable holding a guitar as I am holding a baby, I just hold them both by the neck.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Remember when the most annoying thing about Twitter was trying to think of a shorter word.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Spotted on YouTube:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

Just shared via YouTube:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

It’s my birthday, but I’m not gonna post about it for attention like some kind of loser.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

Spotted on Messenger:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

The first bowl of cereal makes you want a second, but the second makes you wish you stopped at the first.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨