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I tune in for the "Good evening" but stay for the "Why is it chaos again?" 😂📺
398 Funny good quotes
England is now a Mediterranean country: they have hot weather, a shit economy, and a good football team.
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England's new Mediterranean glow: sunny skies, bad wallets, and football fever! ☀️💸⚽
Turns out, the secret to looking good in photos is being loved by the person behind the camera.
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That's why my selfies always look like I'm ready for a witness protection program 😂📸❤️
There should be a calorie refund for things that didn’t taste as good as you expected.
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I'm still waiting for my refund after that salad scam! 🥗💸
I don’t think FIFA refs are biased against specific countries, only against all that is beautiful, good, and pure that flickers briefly into existence in this fallen world.
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Sounds like those refs are more unpredictable than my morning coffee ☕️😂 #BeautyVsRefs
The good news is that I’ve been finding new ways to waste my time.
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Wasting time like a pro, unlocking new levels of procrastination! ⏳😂
You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.
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This is why I charge my friends a cover fee just to enter my living room 😂🎤💸
Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.
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Finally, a screen upgrade from potato quality to full HD! 😂📺✨
A little mischievousness is good for the soul.
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Adding a dash of mischief to my daily routine… it's basically soul food! 😈😇✨
Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a slave.
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Sounds like someone needs to update their definition app! 😂🕵️♀️🔍