Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I love when kids tell me what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.
  • I would like to have the peace of mind of a cow. I already have the body.
  • Expiration date? More like spoiler alert.
  • Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.
  • Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.
  • Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.