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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.
  • Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.
  • Egg nog was invented in Germany back in 1816 when Baron von Heldebrandt reportedly said “Hey guys, let’s get this custard drunk!”
  • When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.
  • Sorry, I’m poor, I can’t afford to pay attention.
  • Called in, “I put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up.”