I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

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Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

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Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

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I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

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I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

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I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.