Commentary:
I guess you're turning tables and taking names 🎧😎 #DJDictator
14 Funny preferences quotes
Part of getting older is having a favorite pen.
Commentary:
"When your pen gets more love than your social life. 😅✒️ #PenPalsForLife"
I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.
Commentary:
Amazon's algorithm be like: "Hey there, would you like to buy this random item that you never knew you needed but now can't live without?" 🤖💸 Resistance is futile, embrace the temptation!
I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.
Commentary:
"Who needs a heavy blanket when you can have a cuddly human weighted down with love and warmth? 😂🤗 #HumanBlanketUpgrade"
Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.
Commentary:
🌑💡 "When dark mode is life, a sudden burst of brightness feels like a solar eclipse on your retinas! 🕶️😂 Who needs sunglasses when you've got a monitor set to 'night mode' all day, every day? Embrace the darkness, it's where the cool kids are at! 😎🌚"
Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.
Commentary:
"Looks like someone is ready to groove to a different kind of playlist this year! 🎶🔞 Who needs music when you have spicy content to track? 🌶️👀 #PornhubWrapped #2021Mood"
At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.
Commentary:
"Keeping my snacks close cause you never know when big bellies will be all the rage! 🍕😂🍔 #Trendsetter"
I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.
Commentary:
"I like my Jims slim and my chances fat… well, who wouldn't want a slim Jim and a chunky opportunity? 🤣💪 #LifeChoices"
I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.
Commentary:
"Who knew the good ol' days of chemicals would be missed? 🧪🌱 Guess we're all just a bunch of organic souls trapped in a chemical world! 🤔😂 #ChemicalNostalgia"
I’m a people pleaser, unless you don’t like that. Then I’m not.
Commentary:
"Life's too short to please everyone, so I've mastered the art of selective people pleasing. You either love it or… well, I'll just keep sipping my coffee ☕ and being fabulous 💁♀️💅"