Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I hope Instagram is still active during the apocalypse, so the zombies can post pics of whose brains they’re currently eating.
  • Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.
  • Just had my biannual teeth cleaning like some barn animal.
  • You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?
  • Dude, we’re gonna be treating others how we want to be treated later if you wanna pull up.
  • People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.