If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

Trendy Funny Quotes

  • When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”
  • If your god commands you to kill others, find another god.
  • Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough.
  • I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.
  • Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
  • Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.