Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with them. It's like a twisted scavenger hunt where the prize is realizing I'm broke!"

broke, funny situation, house, humor, joke, just, laugh, money, robber, search, situation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

0

2 months ago

change, cheeseburger, comfort, comfort food, craving, food, happiness, humor, mood, never
Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

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2 months ago

busier, dating, humor, interest, nobody, rejection, sarcasm, woman
Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

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2 months ago

advice, baby, carpet, confidence, empowerment, flag, humor, let, red, red carpet, red flag, relationship, relationship advice, self-worth, treat, whole
Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

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2 months ago

autocorrect, drunk, dumb, dumb thing, humor, person, phone, technology, thing, tiny, tiny person
My default setting is sexual energy.

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4 weeks ago

default, default setting, energy, humor, personality, setting, sexual, sexual energy
He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

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2 months ago

animal, attempt, best, croc, died, doing, fashion, humor, irony, trying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

80 shares on Instagram this month:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

12 shares on X this month:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

58 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

60 shares on YouTube this month:

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

Remember when we used to jump out of the swings? Those knees were fresh, fresh out the box.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s freaking me out to think of how bad I’d look at the Met Gala.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

Are you ever so happy to be in bed, you wish you could be even more in bed than you already are?

54 shares on Instagram this month:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Please try to schedule meetings around my need for attention.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Bursting into a million bats the second I see you.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Go ahead and use that semi-colon; no one will know you’re doing it wrong.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

Trending via Messenger:

I couldn’t work at a zoo. I’d have a penguin in my car by the end of the shift.

Going viral on Discord:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Shared recently on YouTube:

God, please, for once in my life, let me get what I want.

Trending via Twitch:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

Making waves on Instagram:

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Going bananas on Discord:

The first five days after the weekend are the worst.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

My default setting is sexual energy.

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨