Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

“This too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

The sexual tension between me and the person I’m not supposed to have any sexual tension with.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Mothers will invent chores just to be mad you’re not doing them too.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

My Mom say that everyone has a beautiful side, so I guess I’m a circle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,271

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Any tips on being smart? For someone just getting into thinking.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Spotted on Facebook:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I believe in annoyed at first sight.

Making waves on TikTok:

Imagine buying a new car, and some superhero throws it at an alien.

Just landed via Discord:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I like my mornings to be slow and quiet. I want the day to romance me a bit before it tries to mess me up.

Seen just now on Slack:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"At least you don't have to deal with dragons or jewelry issues! 🧙‍♂️🔥💍😂"

adventure, blindly, comedy, dodgy, dodgy situation, Hobbit, humor, i, misadventure, risk, situation, situations, walk, walking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

0

2 months ago

ago, dumb, every, growth, humor, i, realization, realize, self-reflection, year
Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

0

2 months ago

accident, before, clothing, daily, daily life, humor, i, just, life, matter, myself, pants, something, spill, time, today, wardrobe, white, white pants
My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

0

2 months ago

9, around, estimate, going, home, humor, i, job, jobs, money, night, plan, quit, relationship, run, tonight, travel, well, wife
Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

0

2 months ago

change, humor, leave, password, people, personal, privacy, security, strangers, underwear
According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

0

2 months ago

advent, advent calendar, anticipation, calendar, chocolate, Christmas, holiday, humor, time, tomorrow, treat
Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

0

2 months ago

alphabet, clever, clever joke, cut, half, humor, joke, me, politics, vote, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

35 shares on YouTube this month:

I could have done without braces back then. What’s the point of having perfect teeth if I have no reason to smile?

60 shares on Facebook this month:

Wine drunk doesn’t even make itself known. You’re just relaxed, and then, all of a sudden, you feel sexier.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

I always sit in the middle stall so I have a bathroom buddy.

21 shares on Snapchat this month:

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

53 shares on Reddit this month:

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

31 shares on Discord this month:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

69 shares on Twitch this month:

Making art is making love to the world.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Roses are pink. I need a drink.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I like warm weather but only to a certain degree.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

iPhone: I’m gonna update your software tonight while you sleep. Next morning, iPhone: I couldn’t do it, bro. Just didn’t feel right. Vibe was off.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

Live now on WeChat:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Spotted on Discord:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I don’t fight my demons anymore. We collaborate.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Going bananas on X:

If my coworker doesn’t stop asking questions on this Zoom meeting, I will drive across town and slap his face on the call.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Just shared via X:

Talking to the stars because people suck.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨