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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

The inventor of autocorrect walked into a bar and ordered a bear.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Until I open the wrapper and look inside it’s Schrödinger’s Kit Kat.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Only a couple more days until I come home and pretend I forgot about Valentine’s Day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,644

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Zen and the Art of Empty Pockets.

Just landed via YouTube:

November should have one more day. Just because to me November 31st sounds real. And also I don’t want to pay rent tomorrow.

Just shared via Reddit:

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Signing all emails with BOOM SHAKALAKA today.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Seen just now on Facebook:

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

If you ever feel stupid, just remember there are people who forgive cheating.

Going viral on Slack:

The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.

Spotted on WeChat:

What is it called when you were overthinking, and it turns out you were right?

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Witty text suggesting skepticism about miracles with a humorous tone.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs a church when you've got a magician in the house? I wouldn't mind a taste of that 'holy' water myself!"

, , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s finally actually Saturday after just thinking it was Saturday every day for the last five days.

31 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m writing a fairytale about a printer that just works.

88 shares on TikTok this month:

The real hack is pouring all that lover girl energy into yourself.

82 shares on Facebook this month:

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

70 shares on Facebook this month:

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

41 shares on Instagram this month:

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Another day of meaningless suffering. Let’s see what awaits us tomorrow.

27 shares on Reddit this month:

Do men know they don’t have to date if they’re not over their ex?

53 shares on Twitch this month:

A pie where there isn’t pastry on the bottom isn’t a pie. It’s soup with a hat.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I would love to be normal, but unfortunately, I was raised by the internet and a microwave.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

A dating app to meet other people with low IQ called OK Stupid.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m proud of myself because, despite having so many expenses, I still manage to add more.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Wish I could just go back to eating cookies and not knowing what day it was.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,663

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

The way my phone’s facial recognition pretends not to recognize me, you’d think I dated it.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

My running speed is very slow because the Discman wasn’t allowed to shake in the past.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Men be like, yes, I hurt you, but now you hate me, so I am the true victim.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Going viral on Twitch:

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Making waves on X:

Drive like no one is watching.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Every year, just in time for Christmas, when it’s freezing cold, the Coca Cola truck shows up. Now, in this freaking heat, it’s nowhere to be seen.

Breaking via Threads:

When old people say, “Long as you happy,” that means you’re pretty dumb.

Spotted on Twitch:

The goal is to make your therapist cry.

Going viral on Messenger:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

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