If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I’m sick of diarrhea. I want to livarrhea.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Basketball’s all like “gimme that pumpkin, I need it” and golf is all like “***k this egg, imma hit it into the sun”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Everyday is leg day when you’re running from your problems.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.