Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the good ol' days when the biggest dilemma was choosing between playing outside or watching cartoons. Now we're stuck debating between updating our software or our social media status. Thank goodness for the simpler times!"

childhood, gratitude, humor, nostalgia, past, simplicity, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

0

2 months ago

chores, cleaning, Earth, humor, kids, laundry, parenting, rocks, time
Due to personal reasons, I’m evil now.

0

3 months ago

attitude, change, due, evil, humor, personal, personal reason, personality, personality change, reason, reasons
Throwing “whereupon” into a few work emails today to keep it fun.

0

5 months ago

communication, email, emails, fun, humor, keep, language, office, throwing, today, vocabulary, wordplay, work, work email, writing
“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

0

2 months ago

humor, i, mean, meaning, patience, self-expression, sit, sit still, still, tattoo, time
Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

0

2 months ago

advice, change, changing, Doc, doctor, give, health, humor, i, lifestyle, me, straight, straight talk, talk, wellness
The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

0

2 months ago

bullshit, grass, greener, humor, life, only, perspective, reality, side

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Guys, please stop wearing NASA shirts, I bet you can’t even name one of their songs.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

88 shares on X this month:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

76 shares on WeChat this month:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

Breaking news is really breaking me.

25 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sick of diarrhea. I want to livarrhea.

89 shares on Threads this month:

Did the people you had a crush on always like you back or are you funny?

92 shares on Facebook this month:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

52 shares on Pinterest this month:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

10 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I’m disgusted by the amount of nudity on Netflix these days. There’s hardly any. What am I even paying for?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I’m not a 10. I’m more like two 5s held together by cheese and chocolate.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Think I’ll get high enough to find out if there’s a God. Stay tuned.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

I accidentally relaxed too much, and now I don’t have enough anxiety to get stuff done.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I can do anything, as long as there’s a looming deadline and serious consequences.

Going bananas on Threads:

I just want a man to look at me the way Doc from ‘Back to the Future’ looks when something exciting happens.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer.

Seen just now on Reddit:

You gotta wonder why they just don’t make all bread garlic bread.

Making waves on YouTube:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

Live now on Twitch:

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

Due to personal reasons, I’m evil now.

Throwing “whereupon” into a few work emails today to keep it fun.

“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨