Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Oh, please do enlighten me with your wisdom on how I should navigate this chaotic ride called life! 📝🤣 It's always good to have a self-appointed expert on hand!

advice, conversation, expert, humor, i, irony, life, live, notes, sarcasm, sorry, take

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

0

4 months ago

coping, coping mechanism, cry, emotional, emotional release, fast, fast food, food, humor, just, lot, mechanism, needs, parking, parking lot, release, therapy
I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

0

2 months ago

antics, appear, binder, binder clip, clip, humor, i, job, just, looks, nowhere, say, surprise
If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

0

2 months ago

ever, humor, i, joke, me, missing, poster, promise, put, self-image, weight
How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

0

2 months ago

am, appreciation, confidence, forget, humor, i, life, love, me, positivity, self, self appreciation, self-love, silly
The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

0

2 months ago

exercise, fitness, humor, i, joke, last, money, month, procrastination, running, spending
Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

0

2 months ago

alligator, hand, humor, irony, own, research, safety, sign, stick, thanks, warning, zoo

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Telegram this month:

Walking up to any crime scene and whispering within the crowd, “It’s started again, hasn’t it?” then leaving.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m pretty sure by now that we’re some kind of satire channel on some other planet.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

A Bug’s Life” (1998) radicalized me.

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

What did people do before eyeglasses, like half the world just walked around not being able to see?

25 shares on TikTok this month:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Was in a bookshop and asked a worker if he could recommend books to me. He said, ‘Sure, they’re great.’

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You’re either really good at wrapping presents or you’re really beautiful and funny. It’s one or the other.

39 shares on Facebook this month:

Forgetting to put jewelry and perfume on is literally the worst feeling.

90 shares on Threads this month:

Everyone is getting idioter.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

Kids are like pancakes. The first one is always a bit strange.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

I actually do check to see if you told me happy birthday before I tell you.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

It’s a fabulous time to be alive if you love: verification codes, verifying your email, yelling ‘REAL PERSON’ into a phone at a robot, reading nightmarish news all day, every day, hot.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s! You’re gonna need several doctors, no matter how many apples.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

Seen just now on X:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Trending via Facebook:

She wanted me to impress her in the bedroom, so I showed her my organized sock drawer and my fresh matching bedding.

Making waves on Telegram:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Just shared via Twitch:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Trending via Threads:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Broadcasted on X:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

Seen just now on Threads:

I don’t like people driving fast—that’s the reason why I overtake them.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

Just landed via TikTok:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨