In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I love airports because the rules of society don’t apply. Eat a pizza and have a glass of wine at 7 am while in track pants. Nobody cares.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Adulting means growing hair in places you’re not supposed to and losing hair in places you don’t want to.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I woke up this morning and my hair looked like a Beatles lyric. Here, there, and everywhere.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

“Mom, how did we get so rich?” your father said, “Thanks, nothing from my end,” on thousands of important Zoom meetings.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Floating on a rock in space, but yeah – 9 to 5 sounds reasonable.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.