Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.
  • Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed their chest because of their belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.
  • Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.
  • When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.
  • I don’t need to bring anything to a knife fight, because I don’t go to knife fights.
  • The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.