I’ve noticed the best way to get somebody’s attention is to not want it anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be justwater.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Googled my symptoms and it turns out it’s just the politics.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.