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🤫 Shhh, quick! Freeze! Monday is approaching! If we stay perfectly still, maybe we can trick Monday into thinking we're just a part of the furniture and escape its clutches! 😄 Let's blend in with the office decor and hope for the best! 🪑🕰️ #StealthyMondayAvoidance

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

1 month ago
collectibles, divorce, friends, humor, i, leave, over, relationship, star, Star Wars, strong, threat, wars, wife
I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

1 month ago
army, crow, feeding, humor, worry, WWIII
Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

1 month ago
algorithm, confusion, engagement, i, impress, just, liking, media, post, social, social media, understand
It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

1 month ago
consequence, fashion, fit, fun, game, humor, jean, jeans, reality, weight
People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

1 month ago
ADHD, distraction, egg, fry, going, humor, i, much, multitasking, people, relatable, too, too much
Losing a white tee to a stain is a different kind of grief.

1 month ago
clothing, different, frustration, grief, humor, kind, laundry, losing, stain, tee, white, white tee

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I won $6 on a scratch-off last night. Out of my way, peasants!

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

The dumbest thing about YouTube ads is how they seem to think that I’m a moron.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

My greatest aspiration is to one day solve a murder on a train.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Imagine being a dinosaur. No work or bills. No drama. Just extinct.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

We need to stop making more Christmas music. We have enough.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Sometimes I can’t believe people have had the honor of experiencing my love and chose to hurt me instead.

Trending via Facebook:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Going viral on WeChat:

My grandad fought Germans on the beaches of Normandy. This was last summer and it was very embarrassing.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Going viral on TikTok:

Cloud 9 is a very high place to fall from.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

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Activity Log ✨

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

Losing a white tee to a stain is a different kind of grief.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m not just a pretty face, I’m also a massive disappointment to my family.

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

I’m 27 and a half. I should be on my first divorce by now.

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

No plans and no pants kind of day.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

If I’m ever in a coma, please pluck my chin hairs.

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

At the airport, and a wife asked her husband, “Where are our seats?” and he responds, “In the airplane.”

I identify as Michael Jackson, so my pronouns are “he/hee.”

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

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Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

Losing a white tee to a stain is a different kind of grief.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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