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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

My muffin top has become a full blown birthday cake.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Prison pen pal doesn’t want us to write each other anymore. Finds my life too depressing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,949

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Live now on Messenger:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Just landed via Twitch:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Don’t come to my house unannounced. I will stare at you from my window.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Our childhood photos might be ugly but those smiles were definitely not fake.

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When I nail a yoga pose on the first try, I start checking if I've accidentally bent the rules of physics! 🧘‍♂️🌀😂

doubt, easily, exercise, fitness, flexibility, humor, i, me, pose, right, self-doubt, whenever, yoga, yoga pose

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

3 months ago
alike, great, great mind, humor, irony, mind, minds, ones, stupid, stupid mind, think, think alike, unfortunately, wit
“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

1 month ago
billiards, favorite, favorite hole, favourite, game, hole, humor, i, me, playful, playful remark, pool, pool table, remark, sport, table
Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

1 month ago
beverage, caffeine, coffee, drink, energized, even, feel, game, humor, i, just, love, me, routine
Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

2 months ago
boo, childish, fun, having, kid, parenthood, playtime, slime, turn
Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

1 month ago
apologize, car, driving, hit, humor, i, personality, personification, pothole, sometimes, vehicle
The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

4 months ago
buy, coming, humor, hyperfixation, impulse, impulse buy, looking, merch, need, regret, shopping, sobering, sobering up, worst

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

My mom and all her opinions are visiting this weekend.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

You are the Monday of my life.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

Just landed via WeChat:

I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Breaking via X:

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

Trending via WeChat:

Whoever named frogs got it 100% right. Those things are frogs.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not a jar of Nutella.

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Friendship is when you don’t tidy up before visitors arrive.

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

For Valentine’s Day, I’m gift-wrapping a shirt my husband hasn’t worn in years. It’s the thought that counts—and technically, I thought of it twice.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

I need money, not feelings.

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

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Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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